Angry

I am angry, i am beyond pissed. I admit i am being emotional on this matter. I am doubting which side you are on now. No words can describe how angry i am right now. I talked to the Cheer president. I have no word to describe how stunned am i as in how did he get to be the president of Cheer? He is so chill, too chill about everything. We discussed about some personal things which is about Rachel after the meeting. He kept on asking me to talk to her. I asked him, why not ask her to talk to me instead. I really just want to clear things up with her. I really don't want to handle this glitch forever. I don't want to hold on to this pending friendship. I am comfortable with who i am mixing with now. For her, it may just be an additional friendship. i don't think we can be as close as before anymore. I just want to clear the air and know why she acted such way to me when we were in UK. The pain was unbearable. And the Cheer President is the last person to talk to, like seriously, talking to him is just useless. I wasted my time. People always expect me to approach them to make things up and put down the ego. But hey, didn't they think of the hurt i felt with what they did? I can be a bigger person and forget bout it, but you and i know that forgetting something that hurts so deeply is almost impossible to forget.

And for us, this relationship. I really don't know where are we going. It felt like you are not there when i need you. Like exactly around when i need you. I had to wait for awhile for you to call back and who knows what you were saying made you sound like you are on their side. I became even more pissed. I just cannot handle this. I just need someone to talk to and not advises or comments or to listen any what ifs. I don't take things lightly and i don't want to. I feel like taking things lightly is equal to not being serious. I am still pissed. Now i am considering if i want to go on this Friday or seeing you.








mun